a stained glass masquerade

the song struck me. are we really all that great and strong in our faith as we portray ourself to be?
or are we really just "happy plastic people, under shiny plastic steeples, with walls around our weakness and smiles to hide our pain"?
i wish i could be true to God, true to myself and true to the people around me. i would give it all for you.

but alas, im doubting the power of words. there is a rather fallacious stand that words can replace the act of doing. expressing yourself in prose and keeping it personal makes a person no different to one of those emasculated gamer freaks whose only acts of machismo are confined to typing rude insults on their computer screens. (ARGH had enough of them!oh Lord give me patience.)
Therefore, words are useless without REAL action! dont say it until you are sure you will do something about it!

the past few days have been really tiring. my home becomes a quiet sanctuary for me. perhaps ultimately, my deepest desire is to be alone. after all, i've failed in more ways than one reaching out to people i care about.

and i need to do up my blog. why didnt God give me a gift for designing? oh, and it makes me wonder who in the world will give a hoot about what i write anyway.